I found Me in You

Hey everyone , I'm back with my next blog. Hope you will  be able to relate to this blog just as you have earlier. Wishing to write more blogs the coming year:)

As every blog goes by my personal experiences and my perspectives, this one experience has let me reflect more from another persons point of view.

I love knowing what people experience and finding out about their take on life. Learning different perspectives lets me reflect and understand myself better as a person. So, this blog is dedicated to everyone, as everyone fights own their battles alone everyday.

We bond with everyone on various levels, be it in happiness, sadness, self discovery and so on. Each of which gives us the idea of what life is in other persons point of view. Especially when you go through a life changing event.

We somehow assume, others wouldn't know your pain, wouldn't know your anguish, wouldn't know what it is to feel the moment. Somehow, we don't pay attention to other people's stories and experiences as we are busy dwelling in our own. We lend ears to listen, but not to understand. Each time I spoke to a person at various situations in my life, it got me closer to understanding that what I felt at the time is exactly what the other person felt in their situations. Just that their experiences and situations were staged differently by life. The pain remained the same.

It all summed up to the fact that I found a part of myself in other person. Our emotions are same, the experiences are different.

Then,why do we fear being open about it and be vulnerable self in front of others? why being strong is the only option? why is it not ok to be vulnerable for a while and learn from it?

As I always say, Change is the fear we carry and the prison we stay in. To acknowledge our emotions we wait for approvals. Until we don't want to face our fears and face our demons, we wouldn't bring in the happiness in our life. Its ok to be vulnerable in anyway you want to be, to come back stronger. Everyone has their own way of dealing with their problems, we should be more accommodating than judging.

Ending this  Make yourself happy before you make anyone else happy. Realize your self worth and wait for none to get that approval. Just Be you :)

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Chained, Caged and Free

Hey everyone I'm back with my next blog. Hope it makes you reflect and act.

This topic is gender neutral and has no intentions of hurting anyone in anyway. 

The picture I have sketched says most of what I want to reflect on. As a human I have felt a lot of times chained by a lot of things happening around us. These chains are not mere restrictions but a way to stop you from being who you are. They are good and bad depending on the situations we face.

Society, Personal Life, Career and Family all sums up to the freedom we wish, respect we pretend to be giving, choices against our own will and the responsibility we take. 

The freedom we wish from all the aspects of life doesn't seem to ever come because there is some more always on the way. If we demand for more freedom of choices, we are tagged rebellious or different. Unfortunately, it isn't. It is just that some people don't want to accept the change. 

Everyone is unique and different in their own way. Then, how is it that making a different choice making me even more different than others?

We are constantly pushed to adjust and behave according to what people say, think or do. But no one thinks that these adjustments and behaviours began because someone stood out to bring in the change. When we can accept those changes gradually then why are we reluctant to do the same for ourselves. None can happen if you don't believe in yourself.

Career was part and parcel of life before, but now that is another aspect we fight for. The choices and changes we make are difficult but achievable. Yet, there is still lack of people standing by you. People do come wearing their masks of, "I'm so happy for you", "I knew you would do it" or the most annoying sentence "It's just your luck". Common people whom are we telling a lie, to others or ourselves? Stop pretending to accept when you absolutely don't. 

How many people do we respect on daily basis?

Few? Rest we pretend, don't we? As I see life, respect is always earned. If someone is doing anything non-acceptable, irrespective of their age, gender or relationship, they don't deserve respect. Yet, we are forced to obey because suddenly our behaviours become unacceptable. There are a few who stand up but alone. Some over the years accept whatever comes their way and remain caged for life. 

Why are we so chained and caged with all of these obligations when we can chose not to? 

It isn't about cultural, religious or family acceptance, but how we as humans want to withstand and free ourselves. 

Everyone talks about change the society or the generational thinking, but its about individual how you want to change or bring in the change. Stop pretending and start accepting yourselves not for anyone but yourself. We have people around to make our world more happier place not to design our life or choices.

Ending on a lighter note, we see birds enjoying the higher they fly, but we fail to notice the hurdles they face. But, yet they fly higher with more determination because its their choice. The choice to fly higher and even to set their feet on the ground. They stay in a group but also wander around individually because they believe in themselves. :) 

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IS IT REALLY A MAN'S WORLD?

Hey I'm back with my next blog and the last one of this year and for many more to come over the years.

This question is something that is bothering me in many ways and I know all have different perspectives and I whole heartedly respect that. Neither am a feminist nor have a drive to prove masculinity and its importance. I am just a human being.

We fight for right of a woman or a man's right. How many have actually focused on the whole agenda called basic human rights. Even in the media or any other portal it is said a girl/woman did this or a boy/man did that. Why can't it be a human helped another human.

Segregation is important at various levels when it comes to being gender oriented. But why put the unnecessary pressure? Can't all work on the same ground level?

Coming to my topic, all men are expected to behave in a certain way as it is said to be that, men are supposed to assertive, tough and focused on material success. I agree on the fact that the roles are being defined from very early stage, but there is a change in how the work is shared by both men and women in recent times.

Then why when a man does a mistake, the entire clan is blamed for it? Sometimes they don't even get to prove themselves. why ? Many men are slaves for the societal pressure and the way they are expected to be. But why?

If a boy is born, he become the bread owner as decided. Why don't you expect the same from a girl and make her independent or give equal rights. Or the next thing that a certain age to be married. Why? Because he will know responsibilities and will be tamed? Really?

What if he never learnt ? What about the pressure he goes through? or the pressure that stresses other relations?

Even men do have feelings, they can't always be tough as expected and they do cry,  may not be in front of us but in own confides of their heart. There is absolutely nothing wrong or to be ashamed of it. They are as human as we girls are. They do go through the changes in life in the same way we do. As much as marriage brings in the change of letting go of our family and starting a new, they are also starting a new life with a new responsibility. Then, why not share and understand their side of the story as well. They every right to pave their way in life and decide their future and commitments and not only on what is expected out of them. Fortunately, or unfortunately our law is biased towards women and I have known the group of men that are hidden from societal knowledge when they fight for rights of baseless allegations of some women and their suffering. Give them a benefit of doubt as well. There is always more to what meets the eye.

Ending this on a lighter note, think twice before you judge a man, be it your father, brother, husband or friend. They may seem to be as scared to be judged as you are. Think in their perspective and understand their struggles and sacrifices. Appreciate their efforts and be grateful for all that they did for you in any way throughout your life.

P.S. No offence to anyone and has nothing to do with anyone who has suffered in the hands of some men.

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Bitter or Better????

Hey everyone I'm back with my next blog. Thank you once again for the over-whelming response and love. 

To begin with my blog, the two words BITTER or BETTER has a single alphabet difference but a lot of difference in the meanings and the roles they play in our lives.

Over the time, each day passes by which is a memory, which we happen to call past. Even a second prior memory is a past memory. Strange how few seconds change so much in our life. We share a lot of memories, good or bad, with our family, friends, strangers, acquaintances, colleagues and so on. We have our own unique ways to store these memories, some hidden, some out in open, some in the form of photos or places and some just like a reel of our life.

Why is it difficult to accept what happened and move on?

Why some have the taste of bitterness?

There is always a point we are struck, either someone knows or no one has any idea of what runs through you. There is always a difference in accepting it and moving on or moving on just leaving it behind. When we leave it behind and try to move on, its re-occurrence in life will pull us back to the point we left it. We go through the same feeling again, maybe even worst only because we didn't make it a better memory.

Better memory need not be making it look happy, it just means accepting it whole heartedly. When bitter turns better, we just learn to deal with it in a much better way. It is, at times important to remember these memories as they make you realize how strong you have stood over the time and how strong you have become as a person. Accepting it and moving on doesn't make you heartless or insensitive as people usually may judge you. You are doing a favour on yourself, a favours of being happy. You are a better judge of your own life, so make sure it is a wise one.

Concluding this on a lighter note, everyone has a dark corner they wouldn't want to visit, either with the fear of losing the way or never coming back. But they don't realise they know the way no matter how much they deny it and when you find a way out, you will always find light shinning at you like it never was a dark corner.

PASSWORD or PASS-WORD

Hey everyone I'm back with my next blog, but before that as always thank you for the amazing response and the long patient wait for my next blog.

My blog begins with two similar words but with different meaning to it and my perspective on it. That is PASSWORD or PASS-WORDS. Here is a familiar topic but with a twist in name.

So lets begin with, why do we keep a password?

Usually it is kept to keep our personal things to ourselves as secret and for security. We give access to only few people we are really close to in life. We are always very guarded about everything that we keep and are extra cautious.

What happens when the password is spread to all?

It just becomes pass-words.

Each of us have few people in life with whom we share different forms of relationship, be it friends, family or confidant to share our password/ secret as we trust upon them that it wouldn't be passed on. Everyone has different ways or expressing themselves. They may or may not share it all but doesn't mean you know it all about them. They may be just confiding in you to know how much they can trust you with their secrets. Each relationship comes with a high quotient of trust factor. When the only person you share it all spreads the word, there wouldn't be any kind of trust or willingness to share.

Sometimes, if someone shares something the a person and they make it as another story and present it to people every now and then, it leads to rumors. Some take it lightly or don't bother to know, while for some it affects for life.

Have you wondered how would it be if someone does the same with you and your life?

May be many have come across similar situations as you are reading through this. Have you wondered you might have done something similar to someone consciously or unconsciously ? If no, that's a really nice thing. If yes, then why? Have you not put yourself in the same situation? what one shares to the other is their personal choice. You can't be the one telling what they wouldn't want to share until they are comfortable sharing it. It is necessary to share a transparency in any relationship than someone else saying the story to them. You know your story better than anyone. If you still don't want to share it, it is your personal choice, no one has the say in it. People don't realize how and when it affects other people's life until it happens to them. Why so laid back attitude towards others?

There is a thin life between sharing something appropriate and telling a well kept secret. As I already said it leads to rumors too. You may not realize it, but it gives a wrong perspective about a person and id there is not trust in the relationship they share with the person that this affects, it lead to breaking of relationships.

Would you ever wish this on you?

No right, then don't. Be sure of what you speak about and to whom are you sharing, than hurting the person you are speaking to and spoiling their relationships and even affecting the person you are talking about. Truth, half truth or lie, you have no right to sabotage anyone's image and relationship until you want to save someone or some situation. Even at times if you overhear someone or someone shares to you, make sure you clarify it to them if you feel the need for it or let it be if you know them well enough than ever judging someone. Doing this saves many kind of relationship's which break apart in today's world. Be truthful to yourself than to anyone else first.

Here's concluding, you may think you have a panoramic view of everything around you and no one would see or know what you did or doing. Never forget that others have the same view too. Stay Happy, Be Calm and Spread Lots Of Love. :) <3

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Underlying ATTRACTION

Hey everyone I'm back with my next blog post but before I start off I want to thank all of you'll for the over-whelming response and appreciation you have bestowed me with helping me complete a 1000 views with seven blog posts over a period of few months. Thank you one and all for being my ardent readers.

So let us begin with the next perspective of life i.e., Underlying ATTRACTION. What were your first thoughts for the word "attraction" ? Maybe a new place, Person or a thing? But my idea of Attraction holds a special meaning here. Underlying ATTRACTION is the FAITH we hold within us.

FAITH or the law of ATTRACTION as stated in various places is what we strive for in life. The moment when you want to give up and not look back, the urge to defy someone's belief or just say you can't do it anymore. The attraction towards faith is in various forms, be it with god, be it with yourself, your hard work or your belief in something. All this sums up to one thing in life knowingly or unknowingly we start to look through things in life we believe never will happen. It's human tendency to hold up to the last thread of hope. But there are times when people actually give up not because they can't take it anymore or don't have it in them, it's the lack of underlying ATTRACTION, the FAITH.

why giving up seems the best option at times?

Why not facing it is the best solution to the problems in day to day life?

How many times have you told yourself that it's over, no more, I quit and various other phrases ?

The world is working at a lighting sped which adds up to the expectations and competitions that are heading our life. There are times when I have had issues holding on to this underlying attraction, thinking I would give up but then life has it's own ways to teach when you least expect it to. As I said earlier we hold up to even the last thread of hope, that's what I did and I know many do the same too. There is nothing wrong in being in such situations in life, no offence to the people who don't believe in facing anything as such. Being a human you're bound to learn with each step you take in life, even before your birth. It's a never ending process. But that doesn't mean you can't make any mistakes or errors. The best part of making errors or mistakes is bouncing back with a new determination for yourself alone. Many of you might go back in thinking in what way did this occur to you now. Don't shy away from accepting something and rectifying it in life.

The best way of coming out of this delusion that you can't hold on to the underlying attraction any further is to deal with it in your own ways. Have a self talk ( positive thoughts ), might be sitting in a calmer setting or talk to a friend or a confidant. Go through everything you did in the first place to get here, you'll realize how far you have come in life. Underlying attraction is as imaginary within us as many other emotions/actions we deal with each day. ATTRACTION is underlying, it's within us, all you need to do is to recognize it and make the best use of it. This attraction plays a vital role in life than any other form of attraction.

Ending this on a lighter note, larger part of our life is based on the underlying ATTRACTION, be it as simple as wishing for a pleasant day or a pending work to be accomplished, it's all there. When you gaze at a mountain you realize how far you need to go, but the underlying ATTRACTION, the FAITH, within us makes you reach your destination, even though there are hurdles all through the way. Same way in a new work or a venture, we hold on to the underlying attraction which helps us make it more easier to deal with. Take a step towards it; it will take ten steps ahead for you. FAITH in you brings out the FAITH in your hard work and a zest to life. :)

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Being "ME"

Hey everyone I'm back with my next blog post after a really really long time.First of all i want to thank you all for the review of the previous blog and appreciation. :)

Most of my previous blog posts are inter-related to the relationships with people who are connected to us in our life. So this time it's going to be only about being yourself, expressing yourself, making a choice for yourself- its all about being ME.

The first time and the only time i guess we have completely been ourselves is when we were kids, all carefree, living life to the fullest, no tensions, no baggage's or any kind of self pity. I know many will tell that they are still enjoying their life, but i want you to ask yourself when was the last time you looked at yourself and said your the best? Did something out of your character like a new hobby or work only to see change for once in life? When was the last time you did something thrilling or faced your deepest fears? None or might be something is your answer?

Well, it's how life has become as we are busy running around to prove ourselves in front of everyone, forgetting that it's YOU who needs to be happy from within of what you are doing with yourself, with your life. It's a fast phasing life and everyone are busy trying to attain the highest position or say constant competition to prove that your're the best, but, Is that the success which is gonna give you the feeling of being the best? Of course not, unless and until its your dream your chasing. There is stereotypical professions you choose not by choice but by not given any other choice. Might be your once hobby is what you are passionate about in life. I'm not against educating yourself, off course that's essential part of life and so is your dream and desire for life.

Why not for once give it a try? Something like discovering yourself and not proving to be someone else. You don't have to be a famous personality from any field but be yourself as your uniqueness brings out the best in you. It's not about the language you speak or which family you belong to or what race you are or anything for that matter that defines you, but it's your hidden talents and the ability to enjoy your life, your way. I know there are 'n' no of 'x' factors that comes as an obstacle in many people's life but is it not worth giving it a try in-spite of all this? for once running behind your dreams and being in a life you wish to be. Five years down the line from today is this what you dream yourself to be like? Is this your plan? If yes, don't ever chance your way. If not, then it's high time you buckle yourself up to make decisions for yourself. You can't make people around you happy if you are not happy from within. When you walk your legs balance your body, the same way your dreams, your ideas, your creativity, the zest to lead a content life is what makes a balanced living. Let go of the emotional baggage's or self pity or analyzing self worth. It's not what you were born for and god appreciates each one of us for who we are and what each one of us posses.

Ending it on a lighter note, Do something that makes you happy each day, Enjoy doing something really silly, Be the reason for someone's smile or encouragement and for yourself too, If your hobby is not your passion still do it once in a while because you once enjoyed doing it and it's worth it, Chase your dreams and desires not success and competition, Make time for yourself to collect your thoughts, analyze the things you did and want to do, Be there for someone who'll need you, Go on a long drive or a trip, Face your deepest fears, Enjoy your life to the fullest, Be good and do good but the end of all be YOURSELF. Life is too short to hold anything against anyone but long enough to lead a happy life and do what you always have wished for. Remember, wishes are made to be turned into reality someday.:)

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